I was a naturally shy child in my younger years. I was bullied almost every day in school. My dad was also one who would avoid ANY type of confrontation he could - a form of people-pleasing.
I didn’t have many friends growing up, so later on in life, I would be ecstatic for ANY Friend, even if they weren’t good for me, or tended to use me for something. I didn’t learn how to have the right kind of friends and this has caused MUCH hurt in my life.
There is this ‘’one word’’ we have to say sometimes.
<NO>
WE ALL HAVE A RIGHT TO USE IT.
WE ALL HAVE A RIGHT TO NOT BE ‘’AFRAID’’ TO USE IT.
The worst things that happen to us, usually, are the cause of a boundary issue, knowing when to say yes or when to say no.
It is so hard especially if you have wounds in other areas. Parents, teach your kids how not to be afraid of it. Especially, before they reach adulthood. I think it is the one thing that a kid should learn when a kid prepares for adulthood.
If you have to take courses or another type of training to help. Don’t be afraid to.
My biggest hurts and mistakes came out of being afraid to say ‘’NO.’’
Friends
Trust your instincts always. If you don’t have a good feeling in your gut. Do not agree with "anything." MOST things you can think about. For the things that you can’t, this is why you need to be so in tune with this area.
RELATIONSHIP SCAMMERS… SO MUCH FRAUD. Trust your gut!
So things don’t catch up to you like they did me, and then you are "really in a pickle." If you have a dream, pay attention to it. (Also a recent experience) Dreams do guide us as well.
If you have to role-play for practice, do so. Whatever you have to do, do for you!
Written by: Nahani Johnson April/22
Living with 22q
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